From a larger scale all odds and even , success and failure , troughs and crest, all seems same …..

Hmm may be 20 years or 30 years hence when I look upon my back the span of 40 or 50 years what will there be. Will it be the failure in jee or will it be the joy of getting into physics olympiad , will it be the paper back in engineering drawing or will it be the joy of getting 4653 in aieee (though it could have been much much better). Will it be serious fight

with one of my friend or will it be the wonderful adventurous trip to wayanaad with the army of 12 of us. Will it be long wait of call from my parents 1000s of mile away for 2 weeks or the classic sudden unplanned trip to cochin without informing anyone. Will it be long harsh demoralizing deadly scolding of papa or the still audible sweetest voice of the one.

Once I happened to be in hanuman temple near Patna Station with my best friend anurag basant. We were on the floor , looking down anurag said "ashish can you see the beautiful symmetry in such a complicated crowd full of so many diverse category of people , vehicles , building , roads . They all looking so much disordered when you are there right in the centre of crowd.. But all those seem to have some degree of symmetry when looking from here. Infact the farther you go , you can observe the greater symmetry." and today I just happened to first time realize it on my own and really this is one the most beautiful things which nature has to offer us. I am looking at the stars billions of kilometers away and they look so beautiful , I am at the sea beach the farthest of the region looks the most elegant , sitting near the window in a train the distant mountains and trees on it all those look so eyes capturing. And again the list goes on.

So is my life ( seeing from a optimistic eyes) full of these successes and failures , joys and sorrow , meets and leaving , love and pain , wins and losses , ups and highs , baldness and bald hair ,truth and lies and so… but is this only because I am seeing it all with my near eyes and frame. What if after 20 or 30 years these all seem a symmetrical pattern just like the disordered crowd looking somewhat beautiful and symmetrical when seen from some distance. Are these so many pairs just making life more wonderful , beautiful ,symmetrical and being in the resonance with the nature. Again seeing with the optimistic eyes, these all seem so beautiful. So why to worry , why to be ashamed , why to be suppressed , why to be dumb , why to be action less , why to fear , why not to fail , why not to fight . So let me be as unsymmetrical as I can now for it to become as symmetrical 30 or 40 years hence.