when your smile and hair resonates with the wind...

Seriously never ever come in doubt that i m in love just like the shahrukh of veer zara , kal ho na ho etc..
Its just that i experience the smile , power , confidence from within or in fact having no source while walking alone at 9 pm amidst the long waving trees, these days. I dont know why but i love this.. seriously speaking its the best part of coming to nit calicut where you can find tress even on the marbles. well the best part comes while travelling to the city on the bus, sitting near the window, bus going at 65 km/hr and my ( i have got one of the famous hairs here) hairs waving in all directions and suddenly from where i start smiling and simply enjoying this journey for about 1 hr and the same while returning back. also frankly speaking i prefer going to city,  to be in resonance with this wind for 2 hrs, ofcourto going there and having  the blast or going to malls are also the reasons..  Its simply amazing. u all (   what a   probability of you to enjoy this experience(by my influence ), 1st of all u need to be 1 among the billions lucky enough to read my blog and then lucky enough to come to nit calicut) can try this. but 1 condition leave behind all your thoughts while traveling. be simply thoughtless coz out of thoughtlessness come the resonating smile on your face..
so i am going to enjoy this, try your luck if you could...

Just felt like writing........

WELL ITS Saturday here in fact everywhere. just took my bath and feeling really fresh. today i had to wake a bit early at 9 30 am for playing cricket but then match was cancelled. and soon got calls from my team members (english project), i being a group leader regarding when will i start as we have to submit it it on monday only and i have not even started . but being the leader all i could say is trust me. and then i came here computer center for doing something related to project but then again dil hai ki maanta nahii.. i started blogging.
                

               another issue which is really hurting from past few days is that , i ashish kumar pathak is plotting against 2nd year seniors.. well not even in my dream , this thought had ever come into my mind. i dont know from where my name along with 3 suddenly got this red light attention. Gradually i was having a feel of good relationship with my seniors and i really was enjoying this and loving as well, and now i dont know from where this all has got "u" turn.
why will i do such mean thing, i was enjoying raging, atleast i liked to be slapped once in a while but still .....anyway i cant do anything in this case. though i have talked to some of the seniors related to this and telling i m not the guilty.    hope all this gets changed........

LESSON ONE -- B.TECH 1ST YEAR NIT CALICUT.................

      sometimes while sitting alone , i get to realize how much i have learnt in last 10 months or so....as long as i was in home , i used to see with only mine frame of reference and had made some misconception and thought world is limited to that only. but now gradually and steadily i am getting to realize the beauty of every experience, lesson of every experience which always tries to make me, you a better person. well to be frank i am 67% successful in this case.

                        To be really truthful, i was indeed a narrow minded person, not only narrow minded but had very little knowledge about this complex universe. my world was just limited to small radius of this infinite world. But now i get after meeting so many different type of people , sometime a feel of pride automatically arisies for knowing these many diverse categories of people.

initialliy i dont know why , but i think my friends tell true that i was a child. i used to be influenced by other's sweet words so easily. in no time i used to like any new people whom i would interact for even few days . AND THIS  CONTINUED here till 1st semester and infact is continuing now. but after getting thudershocks from those whom i liked the most is what preparing me to become a more mature person and know that the world and its people are not so straight and simple. ITs really difficult to have a true friend, true person to rely upon. in 1st sem i almost liked everyone from our group of 20 people or so and feel that they all are good, pure and now when you get to know that its just doesnt matter to them , really hurts and so prepares you for a healthy future. may be its my negative attitude that i start expecting from someone the same way what i have it for them ,without even letting them know that i really care for them.. may be i start liking so many... i dunno why.. but now i am restricting myself . to be really frank now leaving 1 or 2 in the college i just cant trust anyone... well now my power to have faith on someone is fading. SOMETIMES its feel why not to  leave alone. have friends just for yes or no or formality.. but again its heart's problem it just start liking anyone who he wants....so its better to leave your emotions and become a hard person which again i know i just cant do it. so what will i do which again i dont know. but yes now i m not going to make extra contacts.and will just stop expecting for the trust from anyone even those 1 or 2. atleast i will feel secured. because u never know when someone will leave you because you never mattered to him.

                                So stop expecting, liking , trusting , love nature, parents and if you get some girl and love ur life.. My lesson of 1st year betch, NIT CALICUT..........

WHEN U REALIZE THE PAIN AFTER MONTHS OF ITS IMPACT.............

    WELL its really strange , that after almost 9 months of jee shock...the disappointment of not getting into iits has  began hurting me... till sometime before, i had almost forgotten about this incidence. In fact after the result also, it never hurt me that much... i was pretty good at recovering myself from the shock very soon.
                  but now seeing my roommate preparing for jee and myself though wanting to give jee again , cant give.. has gradually   started to hurt me. whenever i see him solving sample jee paper, it reminds me back of my preparation days. When never in my dream i i could have thought of getting more then air 1000.. also knowing the place where i m in "nit calicut" is not of my type. Here like school u have write damn note, practical in copy , attend boring classes.. go behind pointers. study what u dont want and dont study what u want. and too much strictness.....   which i never had the habit of.
            well all these sometimes make me frustrated with nitc.. so may be if i would have been in  or be in iit then may there sitiuation would have been better. atleast students would bee more creative or professor would be more creative and more concerned towards interest based studies...
         all these resulting in loneliness , sometime even tears come when thinking of past.. but now i have no other means. i have to stay here. MAY be yet again god has better plans for me..i HOPE i understand his riddles... well i need to do this very soon else sands will slip of my hands.....i need to hold back it till find the golden pebble in it..
    Well i never thought of  doing jobs , placements.. I always had my side towards physics , some good social work to help others and rest traveling..... i want to do this much only .. for this i need to divert my focus from my past to future.
         HOPE I BECOME DETERMINED SOON ......................ITS NEVER TOO LATE TO BEGIN AND NEVER TOO LATE TO REALIZE FUTURE ALWAYS COMES AFTER PAST .. AND FUTURE AND PRESENT CAN ONLY HEAL PAST..
SO I M HERE TO DO IT.....GOD BLESS ME.. FRIENDS BLESSS ME.. READERS IF THERE ARE BLESS ME... PLZZZZ